FAQ

So what the hell is this, some kind of website?

For the most part, yeah.

I’ve never even heard of most of these movies. WTF?

One of the features boasted by Netflix is that it has hundreds of movies available to “Watch Instantly” (play the movie streaming on your computer or XBox or whatever without waiting for a DVD in the mail). However, once you sign up, you’ll quickly realize that most movies you actually want to watch don’t have this feature. But why let it go to waste? There are plenty of “Watch Instantly” movies worth watching and plenty that aren’t. We try to sort that out for you.

So you only review Netflix “Watch Instantly” movies?

No, we’ll review whatever we feel like including movies only on DVD, movies in theaters, TV shows, and your mom’s cooking, but the majority are Netflix “Watch Instantly”. That way, if after reading a review you decide you want to watch the movie, you’re a couple clicks away from doing so.

Sounds like you guys have nerd-boners for Netflix. Are you affiliated with them?

Not at all. We’re simply patrons.

What makes you think that in a world ridiculously over-saturated with movie review websites that anyone would give a shit about what you guys think?

We’re naively hopeful.

So you’re admitting that you’re a drop in the pond…

Yeah, although we’d like to think that this site is a little different.

Oh, this ought to be good.

Shut up. See, it seems that most movie review sites exist solely to prove to the world what impeccable taste in film the author has by holding every movie to some ridiculous standard of excellence achieved only by a few films in history. We, on the other hand, have nothing to prove and review movies based simply on their ability to entertain, or at the very least keep our attention for their duration.

So you give good reviews to bad movies?

Not really. If a movie is bad – like agressively unwatchable – we’ll tell you. However, if a movie is just mediocre and not overtly challenging the viewer to get through it, we focus on the positive aspects instead of condescendingly trashing it.

But I’ve read a couple of reviews where you do trash movies, you hypocrites.

Yeah, well, here’s the deal. When you eat a cheeseburger, you don’t get pissed off that it doesn’t taste like filet mignon. However, if you order a filet mignon and it tastes like a cheeseburger, you can go ahead and be pretty unhappy about it.

That is a retarded and not all together accurate analogy.

Whatever. All I’m saying is that when you sit down to watch “Spaceballs”, you can be pretty sure that you’re not about to be taken on an emotionally stirring journey of self discovery, but it’s not attempting to do otherwise. It set out to keep you entertained for 90 minutes and it did its job well. In our eyes, that makes it at the very least a good movie. Conversely, when a filmmaker obviously takes himself very seriously and attempts to create some cinematic masterpiece but it ends up being trite, self-indulgent schlock, we feel that it’s necessary to address that – often harshly.

Well, la-dee-da. Aren’t you just the little Robin Hoods of film review. What are your credentials?

We have none. We’re just a couple of dudes that love movies.

Fair enough. So, if I disagree with your opinion on a movie, should I write you a hostile email questioning your critical thinking skills and sexuality?

No, but you’re going to anyway, aren’t you?

Yeah. Where do I go to do that?

Here.

Thanks.

No prob.